Category Archives: Out Of Ten

A thing about Electra Heart.

Both this…

This is better than the standard cover isn't it let's be honest.

…and this…

This literally did happen.

deserve this:

Well done Marina. I think I can even excuse the lack of a full stop

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Boyfriend is completely and utterly fantastic.

Did I leave the fondue on?

Look, the sooner we all accept that we love a Justin Bieber song (a Justin Bieber song that features both the words ‘fondue’ and ‘swaggie’), the easier our lives will be.

I still question whether this will be good enough for his mentalist fans, but there you go.SUBMIT.

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SOUND THE FREE MUSIC SIREN: Soso’s giving her album away.

This is Soso in her bathroom.

Some bastard's been scribbling on her tiles.

I haven’t written about Soso before, but if I hadn’t forgotten about her smashing debut single ‘Who’s Gonna Love Me’ then it certainly would have made my ’41 Greatest Singles Of 2011′ list. Perhaps I didn’t forget about it, perhaps at the time I thought I shouldn’t include it because she gave it away for free or something. Perhaps that’s complete bullshit because i’ve just checked on iTunes and it appears to be available for download for seventy nine pence. REGARDLESS. It was amazing, Soso looked like she had the potential to be very amazing, and basically all was fine and dandy and amazing.

Well, yesterday, this happened: Continue reading

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MDNA: One week later.

Let’s have a look at a nice picture of Madonna from the MDNA album booklet.

This is quite a nice picture isn't it.

It’s fairly nice isn’t it.

The lingering feeling that MDNA has more to give than it let on was overwhelming me, but I was losing the will to listen to it with the oddly fragmented and very skippable tracklisting. So I did something i’d never properly done before: swizzled it all around in my iTunes to an order I found more appealing and hacked off the dead weight without mercy. (Spoiler warning: Girl Gone Wild didn’t make it.)


1. Turn Up The Radio
2. I Don’t Give A
3. I’m Addicted
4. Masterpiece
5. Love Spent
6. Gimme All Your Luvin’
7. I’m A Sinner
8. Some Girls
9. I Fucked Up
10. Falling Free
11. Gang Bang
12. B-Day Song

The first thing you’ll notice is that there aren’t any shit songs on it any more. This is often a fairly important step in ensuring that an album is not shit (‘The Music Industry’ might want to take some notes at this point). But the second thing you’ll notice is that there’s none of this ‘winding down’ bollocks towards the end. The fasties aren’t all piled at the top and the ballads aren’t all shoved to the bottom. Because that’s how albums and, importantly, Madonna albums, used to be. The album has room to breathe, and to pull every single one of its twelve ‘very good or better’ punches.

And that’s that. I understand that i’ve written about Madonna three times within the last week, but don’t complain. Most people born within the last 10,000 years will understand that when Madonna releases an album it’s generally a FAIRLY BIG DEAL. And now, finally, we can enjoy MDNA for what it was meant to be: a joyful and at times completely riotous ride through what lies at the core of a woman Wikipedia calls ‘an entertainer’.

The music.

Now that’s more like it.

*Well, it won’t actually change your life. Because MDNA isn’t a life changing album. But it has the potential to be ‘just’ a brilliant album. And that’s okay. Pop doesn’t have to change your life. Being ‘very good’ is often enough.

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MDNA isn’t perfect. But it isn’t always bad.

Another MDNA review.

MDNA is a strange one. Not since ‘Music’ has Madonna presented us with such a mixed bag of sounds, influences, styles, and as such we’ve gone twelve years without a straight-forward Madonna Pop Album. And I must say that as a reviewer it threw me into a complete tail-spin. I barely had time to catch my breath after the dirty gyrating squelch of ‘Some Girls’ before I was thrown right into ‘Superstar’, all cheery guitars and handclaps.  ‘American Life’, ‘Confessions On A Dancefloor’ and ‘Hard Candy’ were all easily labelled as albums because it was clear with each album what Madonna set out to do. Acoustic techno. Disco dance. ‘R&B’. But with MDNA its all very murky at first…and indeed with time you begin to realise that in fact no, it’s not obvious what Madonna’s trying to do, or whether she was even trying to do anything at all.  Continue reading

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