Tag Archives: Cher Lloyd

The 41 Greatest Singles of 2011

And here they are.

So, 2011 has sort of happened hasn’t it? And quite a lot of artists released good singles in it, which can get a bit confusing in the day and age where LMFAO are the year’s biggest selling iTunes artist. So HERE ARE the best fourty one singles 2011 had to offer, in reverse order so there’s a poptacular drum-roll from the ‘fucking good’ through the ‘absolutely chuffing brilliant’ right up to the ‘OH MY BLOODY GOD’ ones at the end. Any problems? Of course not. Here we go. Continue reading

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I’M SO SORRY.

Clearly, doing 90% of a massive rant and then promising readers the full thing tomorrow on the eve of one of the busiest weeks of your life is not exactly a smart move.

But I never said this would be a smart blog. I am relatively sure that merely eight posts ago I referred to the clips of the Cher Lloyd album as “brilliant”. Sadly, on further inspectively, there proved to be only two properly brilliant songs on it (the deceptively brilliant With Ur Love and the more obviously brilliant-even-though-its-more-than-a-little-bit-ridiculous Dub On The Track). So much indecision! Margaret Thatcher would be turning in her grave.

Or would she?

 

 

NOTE: In order for this amazing joke to work, you have to pretend that Margaret Thatcher is dead. Which she isn’t.

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Brace yourselves everyone.

Sticks + Stones

Clips of a reasonable length from Cher Lloyd‘s album are up on iTunes…and they don’t sound half bad. Good, you might say. Really good, you might say. Brilliant, even. Swagger Jagger will have to be immediately removed from the tracklisting of course (or at least, the chorus will), but it sounds very much like this will be somewhere above the region of great.

I could be wrong, and the whole thing outside of those 13.5 minutes of clippy wonderfulness could just be Cher screeching about how much everyone hates her and wants to be her, but it could well not be. It could be a nine track tour de force featuring Cher finally fulfilling all that potential she oozed all over the X Factor stage. But either way, I have quite a bit of hope now. And only a track as collosally shit as Swagger Jagger could destroy that.

So please Cher, for the sake of my blog (and my sanity) don’t make me change my mind again. Stick with being brilliant or wallow firmly in the shit.

Cheers.

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A Cher Lloyd song that is not shit.

Do we all remember this?

This was the moment that everyone who loved Cher Lloyd‘s first audition but was disappointed by almost everything that came after breathed a huge sigh of relief. Cher could deliver a massive pop performance after all. Pitch perfect it wasn’t, well costumed it wasn’t, and related to the theme – Halloween, for fucks sake – it most certainly was not. But everything slightly off about the set up fell away the moment it transpired that Cher could sing about something that mattered, to a brilliant tune with fantastic production, and just get it. She had popstar potential again.

BUT WAIT.

Then, of course, Cher proceeded to shit all over her popstar potential by a) acting like a dickhead, b) getting a bit ahead of herself and c) releasing Swagger Jagger without the slightest trace of a tongue in her cheek. This you should remember. Then she started preparing to release a second single and the tracklist to her upcoming album came out and everyone over the age of 14 just lost interest a bit.

BUT WAIT.

Cher’s label have today announced that when you pre-order Sticks + Stones (her album, not the wrist-slashingly brilliant Nicola Roberts song of the same name) from her official website, you’ll get a studio version of Stay. Lure back disinterested X Factor watchers by promising them a proper song version of what was generally agreed to be her biggest X Factor “moment”, slap Cher’s X Factor rehearsal vocals on top of a karaoke backing track – a PR job well done. Drinks all round.

BUT WAIT.

It’s actually not rushed or sloppy or lazy or rubbish: it’s brilliant.

Of course, it’s not good enough to convince me to pre-order an album that we all know is not going to be very brilliant, but it’s a start Cher. It’s a start.

EDIT: Hold the bloody phone! You can pre-order the album, download the song instantly and then cancel without paying. Sometimes music is just so good that not even a hugely mismarketed album can hold it down.

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